Society tells us to be ashamed of our scars but I say let the world see them so that they can see part of our story. Our scars do not define us rather they help show us what we have overcome and what we are capable of.
I was inspired to do this project because a photographer friend of mine, Abi Q, took a picture of my scar three years ago and I found much healing in it. I started to truly see how beautiful my scar was and the story it told when I saw it captured on camera. I hope you enjoy the beautiful pictures of these wonderful woman’s scars and the stories that they tell.
My vision for this project was to make it in black and white so the focus in on the scars. I truly hope and pray this project helps these women see how beautiful their scars really are and how brave they are for overcoming so much at such a young age.
Jana, 26
My story is a complex one at best so I am only going to talk about the three surgeries that relate to the scars that are shown. Since birth, I was born with toes that were intertwined and bunions. They told me that if I did not have surgery by the time I was 18 I would be paralyzed. Therefore, when I was 16 I had full reconstructive surgery (plates and screws in them) on both my feet and had to learn how to walk again the summer before my senior year of high school. This surgery was by far the most painful one since my body rejected pain meds a couple days after surgery. It tested me emotionally, spiritually and physically. However, it made me so much stronger as I realized with God I could overcome anything.
Backtracking a little when I was 15 I developed scoliosis but it was a rare type that developed very quickly. My spine changed within 6 months and I had to go into surgery the summer before my junior year of high school. This was my first major surgery. They fused a rod and screws to my spine. This was the first time I truly realized I was different from the other teenagers at my school and I felt that life from here on out would be different.
My most recent major surgery is actually my smallest scars. I had a hysterectomy a year ago. I have two scars on the sides of my pelvis and one on my belly button. Although these scars might be small they hold great meaning to me as it meant not having children physically. Even though Eli and I are so happy to adopt it still took us a while to process this surgery emotionally.
Photo credit: Eli Contreras/Kim McKee, Edited by Jana Contreras
Shay, 21
I went to the doctor to try to figure out this pain and when they told me I would need surgery it completely ruined my day. My first thought was God why did it have to be me? I have done everything to worship the King. Now you may think it’s just surgery but you don’t understand it is frightening and scary when you can’t fully comprehend. They’re putting two metal rods down my spine so I can get my back in line. I am going to have a scar down my back for the rest of my life. But in some ways that will be kinda nice. When people see it they can ask me why and I can say because it’s Jesus plan for my life. I now realize that this is an opportunity to share Jesus Christ through my actions and through this surgery for the rest of my life. For I know that Jesus loves me as much as anyone on this earth and I know he has been taking care of me ever since my birth. I can’t wait to see what he has planned for me he truly is my savior and my king.
Photo credit: Jana Contreras
Ellee, 20
I was born with hip dysplasia, but it wasn’t diagnosed until I was 18. They found it because the shape of my hip joint had caused the cartilage to tear, making me suddenly unable to walk. Soon after the diagnosis, I had a surgery on my left hip called a Periacetabular Osteotomy (PAO). Basically, breaking and reconstructing the whole shape of the joint, then screwing it back together. One and a half years after having surgery on my left hip, I had the same surgery on the right side. These scars remind me of the journey I went through of literally being broken apart and reconstructed, just to come back stronger and able to live my best life.
Photo credit: Ellee, Edited by Jana Contreras
Holli, 35
It was the week before Thanksgiving of 2017… I’ll never forget hearing the words come out of the doctor’s mouth “ you have breast cancer”. I was soon after diagnosed with late stage 3 Invasive Ductal Carcinoma with type triple negative (which just means its rare and more aggressive). My oncologist wanted to start treatment right away since I have such an aggressive form and a long treatment road ahead of me. So I have been doing chemotherapy for a little over two months and have about three and a half months left of that, followed by surgery and lastly radiation. I know my God is carrying me through this journey and that He will use it for good.
Photo credit: Jana Contreras
Erica, 26
It wasn’t until I was 16 that I found out I had Scoliosis. I would have people comment on my posture through the next few years saying my shoulders were crooked but I just thought it was how my body was built. It became an insecurity of mine because of how crooked my shoulders were. I would try to hide it with big sweatshirts and cardigans to not draw attention to it. Since I was older when I found out I had Scoliosis, my only option was surgery since I was done growing. At 20 years old I went to UCSF and had my surgery. The recovery process was hard and painful at times but it was necessary. Today my posture still isn’t the greatest and my scar is easily noticeable since it reaches up to my neck, but I choose to embrace it rather than feel insecure. It’s a part of who I am and tells a story of strength and courage like all scars do.
Photo credit: Jana Contreras
Katie, 19
I was eighteen years old when I was told some of the worst words you can hear; “there is a lump in your breast”. I blamed God and cursed the world because how could this happen to me? I did everything right so far in my life, or so I hoped. I never told anyone outside my family about what was going on because I truly didn’t want the pity party, especially from high schoolers. It was really scary going about this because no one really knew what was growing inside of me. I asked doctors frequently hoping to get a straight, non-cancerous answer. They never gave me one. I went through weeks of tests and scans, needles, IVs, and cords attached to every inch of my body. I felt completely violated and embarrassed as a human. When I finally got the surgery to remove the alien inside my chest, I was in hiding for a week, which was another hard part to keep from the people I loved but I didn’t want anyone to worry either until I knew what was going on for sure.
I thank God every day for this tumor being caught so so early that I am only left with a small scar and slightly lopsided breasts (which personally, I love). I’m an advocate for self-check exams and regularly going to the doctor. Be OVER dramatic about something abnormal for your everyday life. If I hadn’t told my doctor about what I felt under my skin the time I had…well I would be going through chemotherapy right about now, stuck in a hospital bed, bald and brittle. I’m thankful for being healthy but I’m thankful I was darkened momentarily in order to really see the light.
Photo credit: Katie, Edited by Jana Contreras
Ruthy, 27
This scar, although so small, holds a big spot in my heart. On Christmas day of 2015, instead of opening gifts with my family, I was in a hospital holding my left side, as my fallopian tube was about to burst. I was in a lot of pain and all I could think of was my husband and my 1-year-old son. I never thought it could happen to me. Along with the pregnancy, I lost a fallopian tube, reducing my chances of another healthy pregnancy. I always wanted to have many children, since I was younger, so the thought of not being able to have more crushed me. My husband and I prayed for our future and left it in God’s hands. I would have delivered the baby in August and that month, all the memories and the heartache returned. To our surprise, that month I also discovered I was pregnant again! Worry quickly filled me but I trusted God’s plan. Our rainbow baby will be one year old in just a few weeks and we’re enjoying our blessing!
Photo credit: Ruthy, Edited by Jana Contreras
Sam, 28
2017 was the year I learned about love and the meaning of letting go. December 23rd, 2016 came and the following weeks/ months to come we’re harder than anything I’ve ever had to do because for the first time in my life I wasn’t in charge. I was 16 weeks pregnant, headed home for the holidays when my husband and I were involved in a head-on collision.
I broke my back and had to have an L1-L5 Spine Fusion. I was told I was never going to walk again and I was going to lose my baby. I am happy to report I am walking, and just most recently underwent my second spine surgery, and am continuing to prevail. Since my sweet Avery was conceived, nothing has been according to plan. My daughter and the hurdles I’ve had to overcome have been my life’s most beautiful lessons. She was born and everything else stopped. I came alive with her! I’ve realized some of the greatest magic in life comes from not knowing whats ahead. I have found that the beauty of life is what can start out as an unexpected disaster.
Photo credit: Jana Contreras
Such beautiful stories and pictures.. thanks for being vulnerable and sharing these.
Thank you sarah! Means so much coming from you! Love you!